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Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Instructions

On Sears hair dryer: Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.

On some Swanson frozen dinners: Serving suggestions: Defrost.

On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body.

On Nytol Sleep Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness.

On most brands of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only.

On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: Contains nuts.

On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.

On shin pads for cyclists: Shin guards cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.

On a take away coffee cup: Caution: Hot beverages are hot.

On the bottom of a cola bottle: Do not open here.

Rules on a tram: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be persecuted.

On a can of air freshener: For use by trained personnel only.

On a bottle of baby lotion: Keep away from children.

On a 500-piece jigsaw puzzle: Some assembly required.

On a can of pepper spray used for self defense: May irritate eyes.

Directions for mosquito repellant: Replacing battery: replace old battery with a new one.

On a birthday card for a one year old: Not suitable for children aged under 36 months or less.

On a toilet cleaning brush: Do not use orally.

On a TV remote: Not Dishwasher safe.

On a washing machine in a launderette: No small children.

In a dishwasher manual: Do not allow children to play in dishwasher.

3 comments:

Sue said...

these are hysterical...I especially love the one on the Sears Hairdryer...I worked for the company fo 13 years...They are real afraid of law suits of any kind........

Brenda said...

I love the Fritos one and the toilet bowl brush one is hilarious. Yuck!

LauraBo said...

not sure which one was the funniest! wonder why they feel it necessary to put those instructions on but then - maybe not. :-)